Screw Twitter

Do you love me?
Will you love me forever?
Do you need me?
Will you never leave me?
Will you make me so happy for the rest of my life?
Will you take me away?
Will you make me your wife?

I apologize that it has taken me so long to blog but the past few days have been crazy, complex, wonderful, frightening and to put it simple: amazing. As many of you know I've been with Corin Legard and we have had romantic interests in each other to put it blandly. We've been up and down. I've of course been in and out deciding if Italy is actually the place for me and convincing myself I'm not betraying anyone.

The other night we went over to Ren and Santi's house and showed Santiago how sadistic I really am with a xbox. We were having a blast, it was so fun! Somehow stripping came up and then a Volturi men strip club and after I kicked Santiago's ass I decided to ask Corin what the hell was he thinking. We bantered a bit then he got all serious and threw a song at me called Marry Me talking about claims over each others body and mumbling and then when I realized what he was insinuating and not saying I went into shock. I finally got him to say it and he effing asked me to marry him! He even had a freaking ring! WTF? Like my head wasn't in a complex already I mean it's been a freaking week. I moved into a house wasn't that enough oh no just had to get that final hook in Mary to make sure she doesn't leave. *growl* I had to stay perfectly still and silent so I didn't run before I calmed down completely. I mean really you can't do this stuff to me! I made him look me in the eye and tell me (we sat down first to make sure I couldn't go anywhere without thinking first) when he looked at me I could tell that he was all I needed in this world and that I would never love someone like I love him. I said Yes. We've been to the opera and all over each other all the time haha. So now... I'm at Ren's decorating for guests while she's cleaning up other rooms. It has given me some time to think now that he is away from me for awhile.

I'm so afraid right now I feel like I'm suffocating and I don't even breath! I want to run for 300 miles and just fall over onto the ground. So I'm just trying not to think about it but when you announce it on Twitter and you have a flashy ring on your finger it's hard not to pay attention. I'm so confused... I'm not me this is not me. I wouldn't sleep with the enemy let alone marry him and just hop right into the Volturi family "Hi guys it's me CRAZY MARY wanna be my friend? ooo You're shiny and pretty we should get married!" I feel nausea coming on again. Slow taking this very slow especially since Renata talked me out of eloping. I'm going to go finish the rooms up and maybe talk to Ren about it some more.(not like she hasn't heard enough of me the past few days)